G3bRio - What's in a Fascination?

I learned at 15, that I didn’t want to accomplish most of the career goals I thought I did. Ever since I was a kid, I’d always  go to the Fox Theatre to see the one and only Nutcracker. As a child I was a handful; an artistic bubble if you will. Fascinated by almost any and everything. I never assumed or thought a simple car ride through downtown would turn into a full on agreement. A answer that sealed most or even all of my life with a poisonous kiss.

The same kiss that has put me where I am today. All it took was a question and an answer. I was so amazed and puzzled at the artistic beauty of effects, the breathe taking lifts, the extradornary costumes, and the many characters that I was blinded by the sweat, and hard work that went into being seen as effortless. The bruised body parts, the many frustrations of learning dances, the pressure it took to be the best. Yes, as that same little 5 year old girl I wouldn’t change my answer. My memory is so vivid of that very day as if it was yesterday.

“Serena, would you like to dance like those girls on the stage”? “The ballerinas?” My daddy asked. I was so amazed at watching the various shapes of tall building. I loved riding through downtown. “Serena did you hear me?” I smiled a wide grin. “Uh-huh” as all I could get out. Almost two months later I found myself in a building with all these strange people. I’ve never been to a place so foreign before. “Daddy im hungry I want a snack.” I rubbed my eyes.

Not your classic fairytale of a defiant “yes” but a good enough answer to seal a deal. The horrific building had a name of course; I meant was it something without a name? No it had a name. Atlanta Ballet was and still is its name. A common commitment that has taken up most of my life, a commitment so strong that my childhood was normal but not one filled with play dates and sleepovers. No, it instead it was filled with hard work and dedication, endless performances and weekends. As I seemingly got older, yes I progressed on my ability of doing “certain things” or as in the words of my dad “perfecting my craft.”

Through all my years of “training”, through all the joyous tears my dancing has made appear, or all the smiles of little girls wanting to be that beautiful ballerina that filled my heart, or all the death glares in auditions or Daddy sending me to wrong audition! I’ve noticed something, although most times the dance life can get hard and stressful at times, I wouldn’t trade my hard work, my dedication, my commitment for anything. Despite the numbing of my body, the bruised and aching feet of point, the harsh glares, and overcoming my skin color, my attempt at doing my best is all I care about. Walking into my first ever ballet class, I realized by having my first ever lesson at a barre, dancing in the center of the floor, and going across it there was nothing that could possibly make me happier.

For once I felt as though that was a way at expressing the little girl inside of me, along with my growing talents. I feel I have come a long way in my journey. I realized that dance would be something I wouldn’t want kids to look up to me for. I’m not trying to be a role model; I’m trying to set trends. So a professional dancer I won’t be but a choreographer I will be. G3bRio